Remus's hangover mistakes
by MisguidedSanity
Summary: What happens when Remus Lupin wakes up to find his bestfriend asleep in his bed beside him, naked?
1. Chapter 1

Remus hates hangovers almost as much as he hated James for giving him a bottle and a half of fire-whiskey and making him down them. His stomach felt like there was wilder beast trampling on his sphincter and his head was about to burst open. It was nothing compared to the pain of his skull breaking and reforming into a different shape but it was a discomfort to say the least. Remus lay on his stomach, his head and arm hanging off the edge of the bed. Out of the corner of his eye he could see James's bed [containing one blonde female] and the sound of running water from the bathroom. Trying to avoid the sensation of nausea, Remus rolled over only for his arms to collide with something hard, warm but soft...

The naked body of Sirius Black was laying next in Remus Lupin's bed, his chest heaving and one hand stretched out as if it was lying across Lupin's back before he moved. With a roar of horror, Remus just up and sideways, landing himself on the ground with a loud thump. Sirius just shifted slightly in the bed, causing his snores to become louder... amazing.

"BLACK!" Remus yelled, standing up only to realise he was butt naked too. Remus dove for the nearest pair of jeans amongst the rest of his clothes as Sirius yawned and opened his eyes, smirking up at the werewolf. "You called, Remy?" He said casually reaching down to scratch his stomach then pulling a blanket over himself.

"Don't call me that!" Remus hissed, zipping up his jeans and searching around for a shirt. "What the fuck are you doing in my bed naked?" he asked, giving up on his shirt as when he picked it he saw up fire-whiskey or some other drink dripping from it.

"Are you-? You don't- You can't _remember?"_ Sirius asked, sitting up suddenly in the bed, looking whole-heartedly insulted. "That's a first..." Sirius mused for a moment before turning back to Remus who looked like he was about to vomit and was confused why.

"Sirius, what the hell happened?" Remus asked, clenching his teeth together, afraid to hear the answer.

"Oh fuck knows but next time, please use some lube, my butt-hole is fuckin-"

"STOP!" Remus yelled, causing the blonde in James bed to stir, moan and fall back to sleep. Remus struggled to get the words out of his mouth as he paced toward and away from the bed, unsure of what to do next. "Si-Sirius Black, there is no way in Merlin's name that I slept with you..."

"That's hurtful coming from the mouth that was _so _so good to me...."

"I can't remember a thing but I do know is that we- us- no! It didn't!" Remus snapped as James walked into the room in just a towel and another towel on his head as he scrubbed it against his hair. He stopped and looked at Remus and Sirius, both looking confused and hurt and Remus looking like he wanted to hit something or rip it apart. He nodded to them before turned to his bed, poking the blonde awake as he pulled some clothes on. Remus and Sirius remained silent until both people had argued slightly and stumbled out of the room, most likely starting round 2... Or 3 or 4.

"Look at us, Remus... You can't deny..."

"I can deny what never happened!" said coldly before reefing the door open and running down to the Common Room and throwing himself on an armchair.

He glanced at the clock, six thirty, far too early for life amongst Hogwarts. Well... Maybe not for the Ravenclaw's or the Hufflepuff Quidditch team who were desperately trying to improve. Remus stared into the flames of the fire, his body curled up into a foetal position. He has never felt so insecure since James had found out he was a werewolf and Remus ran for it. He sat in the same position, thinking about very different thought but the same insecurity weighed him down on his shoulders. If he was really that drunk, could he possibly fathom the sexuality to shag Sirius Black...? Or the lack of dignity?

It wasn't for another hour that Sirius and James had descended the staircase, followed by the blonde who Remus recognised as a girl a year below them. Turning away at the sight of Sirius, Remus focused on the fire again, ignoring his friends calling his name, shoving his shoulder and dropping a pile of clothes at his armchair. It was only then Remus realised he was half naked and beginning to get cold. He heard the portrait hole close and Sirius and James muttering to each other. Remus reached for a shirt and pulled it on before heading up to the dormitory again before changing into his boxers. He couldn't even look at his own bed as he took off his jeans and pulled on a fresh pair. James was nice enough to get his most comfortable pair though they were the oldest and had most holes.

The idea of sleeping with Sirius was inconceivable to Remus. He sat alone at the end of the Gryffindor table, poking his scrambled eggs with his fork before eating a single sausage and leaving to where he could be assured distance from Sirius.

The Library was quiet and it shocked Remus that madam Pince was even awake though she did look like she hasn't slept in a couple decades. He wandered down to the back, the very back... well nearly. The topic; werewolves. It's where he hid and was rarely bothered by students or teachers. He spent many hours reading, studying, trying to find some kind of cure or solution of his illness. He pulled out an old favourite of his, Guide to Understanding the Werewolf. Mostly because it made him laugh at its inaccuracy though a lot of the time it made him think that the inaccuracy was accurate and he was so morphed into trying to be normal, he became inaccurate. James and Sirius had often exclaimed that Remus doesn't try to be normal, because it wouldn't work at his best. He took this in a weird and messed up compliment but somehow nice. He wasn't very far into his book before James Potter sat himself in the chair beside of him.

"Padfoot's depressed, man," he said, not looking at his friend, instead, leaning back on the chair.

"And why's that?" Remus asked, as if he had no idea what was going on. He kept his eyes on the book.

"C'mon Remus, The man woke up next to someone who denied the whole thing! Ego buster, or what!"

"_Nothing_ happened! James, you know me... I'm not gay. I wouldn't have... not even drunk!"

"People will do anything locked in the right situation!" James explained. Remus knew full well that James was talking about the time he had kissed Peter drunkly cause the poor boy complained of never getting to kiss a girl.

"How would that me _right?_ It would be wrong, James. I couldn't have, and he's my best mate, it's borderline incest! He's family to me!" Remus snapped the book shut and stood up, followed by James.

"He's my best friend too and he's outside moping about the fact that one, he wasn't remembered. And two, the one he can rely on won't accept this... this...happening... or talk to him about it without yelling at him!"

"This happening? It _didn't _happen so it _can't _be a happening..."

"Just talk to him... please..."

"Fine," Remus signed before putting the book back on the shelf. He waited for a few moments before hearing a new set of dragging footsteps.

"Mooney?" Sirius popped his head around the corner of the book shelf and looked at Remus for a hard second before walking towards him.

"Sirius, I just don't see how I-," Remus was cut off mid sentence as Sirius's lips crushed against his own, holding for a moment before pulling away. The tears in his eyes almost made Remus's heart crack a small piece.

"I know you won't ever love me... but I have to ask you something..." Sirius whispered, placing his hand on Remus's jaw and pulling him towards him. "Remus John Lupin..."


	2. Chapter 2

"I know you won't ever love me... but I have to ask you something..." Sirius whispered, placing his hand on Remus's jaw and pulling him towards him. "Remus John Lupin..." Remus heard Sirius gulp loudly but before he could turn away, his friend spoke again.

"April Fools!"


End file.
